Your Eyes Betray You.
Brushing my hair incessantly and said to myself with a blank expression and mind..’The dark and twisty tale it could ever be‘…..
In a nutshell, let’s just say that nothing has been equitable to this unfathomable and outlandish. I don’t know what I looked into, the moment the eyelids are wide up, my brain acts as if it’s in a cosmos. Amidst the frightful wind brushing against my body, I ran from street to street looking for ‘her’. Panting, easily rattled. The only one whom I live for.
My precious little Mia had been my sole mark of endearment… And now, I had to live without her for some reason. Longing to listen to her cry out loud “Mommy, come for me” is just ringing into me. It’s been a week now. Not one soul believes my side of the story.. let’say they all look upon ‘this’ as a mere sense of conjecture. All eyes frowned upon me when I quote that my little one was playing along the street with her other two best friends, who live just right across my apartment. Like every summer, she loves to spend her evenings with her friends in the neighborhood.
“I’m sorry, she never played with my children in the recent days…It was just Olivia and Lilly playing with each other 2 weeks ago“.
I had claimed that seeing my daughter play with my neighbor's kids via my kitchen casement was the last time I saw her. That smile which had rubbed off my face ever since that evening has been the worst continuum. No record of her has been captured in the CCTV.
How could it be thought provoking for a 6 year old to run away from her protection pillar? Perhaps, kidnapped? My agonized screams, my weeping, the expression of my plausible story about my missing daughter is suddenly seemed to be the most bizarre and unbelievable to all, including the police! She is my little girl. My darling.
Entering the morgue and crying over her darling’s body will be the worst nightmare for any mom. I wasn’t ready to witness that! While lying down, my mind paints vivid images of her crying for help. Dreadful and overwhelming.
A small ray of hope approached me when I saw my girl’s favorite pink sweater lying down the kitchen window. Sadly, my fate leads me to see her vanish forever. The police claims “You are seeing hazy things..” But I know what my daughter looks like. Or do I? I sobbed, sobbed and sobbed. It’s over. She is gone. I believe she is no more. Long gone.
It’s been 2 days living without her. As I brush my hair against the mirror I imagine my little one hugging me from the back. I can just smile forever and I kiss her.
Well, it’s all a memory now likewise the visions of her playing along the street. CCTVs cannot lie at any cost. All this started off with my nightmares post losing my beloved sister. I faced a lot of trouble. I thought my nightmares were long gone.
But I was never aware of the fact that a part of me has turned into a dreadful stone which lives only by looking at my sister’s death. Look what it has led to. The nightmare, the nonacceptance of losing my sister has taken a toll on my mind and allows it to create false realities……which created a sleeping scenario of pushing my daughter out of the kitchen casement. I live in a hallucination world, not aware!
It’s still clear to the world that ‘my daughter has been faintly kidnapped or ran away….’ and the police continue to search for her in disbelief. But, only my little daredevil which created this false reality knows that I killed her and buried her while I was living in the my another mode of nightmare.
There I go, continue brushing my hair…..longing to find her one day.